How To Use A Vibrator If You're Not Sure Where To Begin?

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Let's be honest: you probably didn't learn how to use a vibrator in sex education class as a kid. Fortunately for you, it's not exactly rocket science, and the learning curve is enjoyable. Furthermore, there is no one right method to use a vibrator; it's one of those things you can learn as you go and personalise based on your preferences.

But that doesn't mean there aren't any tips and tactics to make your trip as safe and fun as possible. Yes, there are! Vibrators can be anything from a fun accessory to a critical component of your sex life, depending on whether you want to masturbate or use one with a partner. Everything you need to know about enjoying the advantages (and vibrations) is right here.

Become acquainted with the many varieties of vibrators.

The sort of vibrator determines how to use it, so that's a good place to start. The vibrator universe is huge and diverse—so much so that many vibrator beginners become overwhelmed when it comes to selecting their first one. Perhaps you're reading this to learn more about a vibrator you already possess, or perhaps you're still trying to decide which one to buy. In any case, here are the main categories of vibrators for persons with vaginas from which to choose (vibrating toys for penises also exist, but that's a whole different article!):

Learn about your vibrator's substance.

What material your vibrator is made of has a big impact on how it feels, what sort of lube you may use with it, and how to clean it. Ideally, you should consider the material while selecting your toy in the first place, but it's fine if you omit that step. You may still study about the material (and make sure it's safe) right now.

Silicone vibrators are among the most popular, and for good reason, according to sexologist and sex educator Goody Howard, M.S.W., M.P.H. Aside from being soft to the touch, silicone is nonporous, making it safe and simple to clean. Porous toys, on the other hand, can absorb and retain bacteria even after being cleaned, according to SELF. That isn't to say you can't use porous toys; nevertheless, if you want to simply sterilise your toy, stick to nonporous. ABS (acrylonitrile butadiene styrene) plastic is another popular and less expensive nonporous alternative. Other nonporous sex toy materials, such as metal and glass, are less frequent in vibrators than in dildos, although they do exist.

An crucial rule: According to Howard, the general consensus among specialists is that your toy should be phthalate-free. Phthalates are a class of chemical plasticizers that are commonly employed to soften plastics, therefore you'll find them in jelly-like toys. Phthalates have been criticised for their potential to harm human health (the scientific jury is still out, according to the Centres for Disease Control and Prevention), but in the slogan of "better safe than sorry," phthalate-free sex toys are readily available. According to the Consumer Product Safety Commission, certain forms of phthalates are prohibited in children's toys.

Go over the instructions.

People frequently miss this step, but they should not! Your vibrator will most likely come with a small booklet with directions for operation as well as other vital safety and maintenance information. At the very least, reading the instructions will provide you with an overview of the controls. Before you play with it, you'll want to know how to switch your vibrator on and off, as well as how to toggle between the various vibration patterns, if your toy has them.

Don't forget about foreplay, especially if you're going it alone.

You may have learned from experience that even when masturbating, you must be in the mood, especially if you want to have an orgasm or two. Plus, it never hurts to relax and get some natural lubrication going.

Howard suggests creating the perfect mood. "I'm very big on both the sensual and the sexual," she said. "Light some candles, make your bed with nice sheets, and turn on some music." "Stimulate all of your senses."

Even if you don't want to go all out every time you want to use your vibrator, a little foreplay can go a long way. "Explore your body using the vibrator," Howard suggests. "Try using it on the inner labia and outer labia and around the vaginal opening without actually inserting it—the whole area."

Use lubrication, even if it's only on the outside.

First and foremost, there is nothing wrong with requiring lubricant. Many factors can contribute to vaginal dryness, and even if you don't suffer from it, lubrication can improve your sexual experience. "Needing lube is not a commentary on your sexual ability," according to Howard. Furthermore, sex toys, in particular, may make you feel a little dryer. "Vibrators have moving parts and motors that heat up." That can cause your natural moisture to evaporate."

You might think that lubricant is just necessary for penetration, however lube can be beneficial even if you're only using a vibe on your clitoris. Your clit's skin is extremely sensitive, and dry stimulation, such as rumbly, lubeless vibrations, may irritate it.

There are three types of lubricant available: water-based, silicone-based, and oil-based. The most important consideration when mixing lube with toys, according to Howard, is if your lube is compatible with your toy. Avoid using silicone-based lube on silicone toys since it will destroy the substance. And, if you're using condoms on the toy (more on that later), avoid oil-based lubes, which can wear out the condoms and render them ineffective. When in doubt, a water-based lubrication is a safe bet.

Do you need to restock? Try these expert lube recommendations.

The purpose of a sex toy may be to experience something completely different than what you can accomplish on your own, which is fine as well. However, if you're feeling overwhelmed by technique and are already familiar with other forms of masturbation that you enjoy, it can be beneficial to begin there. "Think about how you masturbate without a toy," Howard suggests. What type of stimulation do you prefer? You get the picture. Internal or exterior, mild or firm, rapid or slow... "From there, you can kind of gauge what you're going to enjoy from a sex toy."

According to Howard, this is also a smart strategy for selecting a sex toy in the first place. "You can basically reverse-engineer previous pleasure to figure out what kind of toys you should be looking for," she said.

Make it easy to penetrate, especially anal.

If you're going to use your vibrator for penetration, proceed slowly at first, especially if you're not used to it. You can put your fingers first to get used to penetration before using the vibrator, in addition to using plenty of lubrication and taking time for foreplay. This is especially true for anal, which demands you to "work up to it" a bit more. Check out this post for more information on how to prepare for anal sex, whether with a toy or without.

Begin with the lowest setting and gradually increase it.

Many vibrators have many settings that allow you to adjust the intensity of the vibrations. While it may be tempting to turn your toy all the way up, you'll generally have a more satisfying experience if you gradually increase the intensity.

"The highest setting might be too intense for you," Howard explains. "Or it might be fine if you gradually work your way up to it." In either case, starting low and building on your pleasure is preferable to going from zero to five right away."

Oh, and in case you're wondering, no matter how strong the vibrations are, you won't harm your nerve endings. However, it is possible to briefly overstimulate yourself, which may cause you to lose some feeling in the short term. But don't worry about long-term consequences.

If necessary, place a barrier between you and the vibrator.

When it comes to powerful vibrations, some people are more sensitive than others, and even the lowest level may be too much for them. Howard suggests a simple way to dull the sensation in that scenario. "I have clients who actually wear knickers when they masturbate and use the vibrator on top of them because the vibration is too strong," she said. A towel will also suffice. Just be careful not to irritate your clitoris with too much dry friction, as we discussed earlier.

Understand when you should use a condom on your toy.

As previously reported by SELF, sex toys can transmit sexually transmitted infections (STIs) when used with other people, thus safer sex practices can apply here as well. If you're planning to use a sex toy outside of a sexually monogamous relationship, put a condom over it. Also, if you want to learn more about how to use a vibrator with a partner, read this page.

Condoms are useful in a variety of situations, including masturbation. If you have a porous toy that is difficult to clean, condoms are an easy method to keep things nice and clean every time you use it.

Condoms are also beneficial if you want to use the same toy for vaginal and anal play (as long as the toy is anal safe). Use a fresh condom every time you swap holes to avoid spreading bacteria from your anus to your vagina or urethra (and risking vaginal illnesses like bacterial vaginosis or urinary tract infections, as SELF has reported).

Always keep it clean and well stored.

Although it should be clear, many people ignore basic sex toy care, especially if they are simply using it for masturbation. But it doesn't matter if you're the only one playing with the toy; if it's on or in your body, it should be clean. "Not cleaning your sex toy because you're the only one using it is like eating with the same fork for a month and not washing it," Howard goes on to argue. "Sure, it's just your spit on it, but would you do something like that?" No."

The best way to clean and store your vibrator depends on the type of vibrator, but fortunately, this page covers everything you need to know about cleaning and keeping your toys.

Do what makes you happy.

At the end of the day, as long as you follow appropriate safety measures and communicate with anyone else who may be using the toy with you, using a vibrator is simply a matter of finding what feels good and...doing that. Have a good time!